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Some people think I’m schizophrenic, but we’re not.

DarinLand: Interview with a Double

by Darin Lowery

Recently I met with a guy who looks surprisingly like me- so much so, we could be twins- and we had a lil’ chin wag. His name is Darin Lowery and he lives here in Arizona, that “Bastion of the Six C’s” – Copper, Cattle, Cotton, Citrus, Climate and Claypool, though he actually lives in Globe. He took some time out to answer a few questions.

DL: Do you have as much trouble as I do just walking down the street getting your errands done? Everybody thinks I’m you, or you’re me, or-

Darin: It drives me crazy! Being a Gemini is tough enough-

DL: Oh my God! You’re a Gemini?

Darin: We share the same birthday, kiddo. Of course I’m a Gemini! I remember when I saw you on the monkey bars at Herzog Elementary School, and you ran away from me. You were crying.

DL: I was not crying- I was scared. We look so much alike, it was weird. How do you keep yourself so young looking? You must be-

Darin: Fifty-five, last birthday… same as you. I eat whatever I want and lots of it, especially when someone takes me out to dinner, and I get lots of exercise hurling invective and jumping to conclusions.

DL: Your picture is plastered everywhere in Globe- what’s that about? The train poster, the local papers, and here on gmteconnect.com… care to explain that?

Darin: I was born for the camera, what can I say? Besides, I never explain and rarely complain, except about the greeters at Wal-Mart.

DL: What about them?

Darin: They don’t greet. They sneer. This is why I shop the Mom ‘n Pops rather than the big boxes. I love Past Times Antiques. It’s like coming home: Cheryl always hugs me and says I’m a ‘good boy’, and Sam’s bread at Good Junk is just like Mama’s, though Mama didn’t bake- Hell, she had a tough time with a can opener, but I don’t want to dis the dead- so really- let’s talk about me.

DL: What is there to do in Globe? It’s really just a little town, after all-

Darin: There are lots of things to do here! We drink more coffee in Globe than they do in Seattle; eat better green chile burros than they have in Mexico City, and have more sex than a GI on leave in Honolulu!

DL: What? Here?

Darin: Absolutely. Well, at least the coffee and burro part is true. You know, we have a few fancy dress benefits a year, some great parties and barbeques, and the Copper Spike is back in town- what a beautiful train! The people of Globe are very friendly- like me- unless you have a neighbor- like I do- who doesn’t have any covers for his garbage bins, and when the javelinas tear into them and the Chef Boy-Ar-Dee cans roll into my yard, I just wanna strangle him and his crazy wi-

DL: Is it true you work at a real live trading post here in Globe?

Darin: I do unless I’m napping in the back, but don’t tell my bosses Jim and Kelly.

DL: Are you still creating art?

Darin: You know how realtors always say, ‘location, location, location’? In my world it’s ‘color, color, color’. I have a perfect eye- ask anyone who’s admired my plaid shirt/camo shorts look- that outfit I wear with a tie-dyed tee shirt and fishing cap? Everyone talks about it. As far as creating artwork, collage is my game and I now have approximately 129 boxes of cut up paper sitting on my kitchen table. I can’t turn on the fan or the place would look like Baghdad- that’s Iraq, not Arizona. I do my work in an oversized datebook and it’s more along the lines of a graphic journal than anything else. Keeps me out of the bars.

DL: Anything coming up for you? Do you still write?

Darin: Unfortunately, the Nobel Prize went to someone else, so I’ll keep plugging away. Yes, I still write and I’m eagerly hyping the book I wrote early this year. It’s called Daddy, I Can’t Hear You ‘Cause I’m Deaf.  It’s about teenaged angst. When it’s published I’ll probably have to move to LA. Location, you know.

DL: Thanks so much for sitting down with me- no I’ve got the check, you’re welcome- and best of luck to you. Any final comments or parting shots?

Darin: Some people think I’m schizophrenic, but we’re not. Seriously, I’m currently working on a diet book entitled Ask Me No Questions, I’ll Tell You No Size. The artwork will kill you- lots of talking sandwiches. It’s about how I lost 45 pounds in two months by eating spinach, peanut butter and peach yogurt. The diet really works because I’ve kept the weight off for thirty-five years!

One comment

  1. I had a hard time relating to DL, but I felt a real connection with Darin in this article.

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